Just Do It!

I am in the process of forcing myself to do things I sincerely have no desire to do. It's horrible and I hate it. I realize that I have been doing this for most of my adult life. Go to work, cook dinner, do the laundry, be polite, set a good example, eat my vegetables. Ew, peas. Remember trying to force yourself to eat vegetables you didn't want to eat when you were a kid? For me, eating peas resulted in crying, gagging, choking and in a few rare instances actual vomiting. Of course, this was the preferable choice as the other was getting punished (spanked) by mom or dad. I find I still have the same response to forced behavior -- crying, gagging, choking, vomiting.

It's exhausting! Part of my energy is going toward the activity (such as cleaning the bathroom), but an even larger part of my energy is spent resisting and resenting the activity! It's tiring. The resisting and resenting shows up in so many ways: procrastination, diversions like TV and computer, anger and depression. In contrast, when I do something I love I'm engaged and happy which results in joy, creativity and productivity.

So, the question. How do I just do it? I actually typed this question into Google. (man I love google) Here is what I have determined:

• First, I need to realize I will be happier in the long run if I just do the dreaded task. Having these things hanging over my head makes me feel drained and uneasy.

• Take it one day at a time. It might be one hour or one minute depending on the task. When I quit smoking there were days that definitely had that one minute at a time feel.

• Forgive yourself. When you fall off the horse, and most people will, you will jump back on quicker if you forgive yourself. Self talk is good. Self talk that offers forgiveness is awesome! "Michelle, it's ok. You knew this would be hard and it's okay to have a few setbacks. You can do it but only if you keep trying."

• Don't fear failure. Redefine it as feedback. Michael Jordan said (don't pass out because I am quoting a sports figure),

  "I’ve missed more than 9000 shots in my career. I’ve lost almost 300 games. 26 times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.”

• Make yourself accountable. Not always possible but this may be the best idea for me since the only thing I hate more than failing is for you to know that I failed. Tell a partner, friend, mother or sibling what your plans are and ask them to hold you accountable.

• Fake it til you make it! Yes! I found this by googling. Love it! If I don't feel enthusiastic about my task then I need to fake it. Check.

• Do something you love while you're doing something you dread. For me, this equals a lot of music and a lot of dancing! Um, except at certain times of the month then it equals a lot of chips and salsa. Ahem.

Of course, this isn't a complete list but just a few tools for my arsenal. So, I am trying to work on my priorities since I feel like they are screwed up at the moment and hurting people who are closest to my heart. I'm asking you to hold me accountable. Ask me how it's going sometime and if I say "fine" you need to probe deeper.

One final tip I learned quite a while ago (before google!) ....ranch dressing makes peas go down much easier. :-)